Here are some signs and notices written in English that were discovered in hotels throughout the world. And you thought the Filipino's carabao English was bad?
In a Tokyo hotel lobby: "The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable."
In a Bucharest hotel lobby: "To move the cabin, push button for wising floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order"
In a Paris hotel elevator: "Please leave your values at the front desk"
In a Yugoslavian hotel: "The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid"
In a Japanese hotel: "You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid"
In an Austrian hotel catering to skiers: "Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension."
In a Zurich hotel: "Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose."
In a Czechoslovakian tourist agency: "Take one of our horse driven city tours - we guarantee no miscarriages."
Advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand: "Would you like to ride on your own ass?"
In a Norwegian cocktail lounge: "Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar"
From a Japanese information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner: "Cooles and Heates: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself"
From a brochure of a hotel's car rental service in Tokyo: "When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor"
Two signs from a Majorcan hotel shop entrance: "English well talking. - Here speeching American"
In a Tokyo hotel lobby: "The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable."
In a Bucharest hotel lobby: "To move the cabin, push button for wising floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order"
In a Paris hotel elevator: "Please leave your values at the front desk"
In a Yugoslavian hotel: "The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid"
In a Japanese hotel: "You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid"
In an Austrian hotel catering to skiers: "Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension."
In a Zurich hotel: "Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose."
In a Czechoslovakian tourist agency: "Take one of our horse driven city tours - we guarantee no miscarriages."
Advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand: "Would you like to ride on your own ass?"
In a Norwegian cocktail lounge: "Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar"
From a Japanese information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner: "Cooles and Heates: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself"
From a brochure of a hotel's car rental service in Tokyo: "When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor"
Two signs from a Majorcan hotel shop entrance: "English well talking. - Here speeching American"
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